Dirty Dreams novel · Chapter 12 of 24

Chapter 12: Eyes Open

I opened my eyes.

Tate sat at the foot of my bed with moonlight on one side of his face.

He wasn't smiling.

He wasn't smirking, or sorry, or anything but sure.

"How long?" I whispered.

"Since the first night."

"The first..." My throat closed. "You can't have."

"Your lashes moved when Wyatt said your name." He said it plainly, with his thumb still on my ankle bone. "And your pulse was fast under my hand. A sleeping person's isn't."

"You never said."

"No."

"Why?"

"Because you didn't want me to."

I stared at him.

On those first nights, I had thought I was fooling four boys.

I had been fooling three.

"You wrote the question in the group chat," I said. "We don't decide that for her."

"I did."

"You made them stop at the edge."

"I kept them from going past what you were giving. I couldn't tell them why, so I said what I could." His mouth moved, almost a smile. "Wyatt kept trying to quit. Dylan kept saying five more minutes. I watched your face, and I held your ankle, and I decided if you needed me to be the one who knew, I would be."

"And what did you want?"

"For you to pick your own door."

I sat up.

My hands were shaking, and I was angry and relieved and so wet I could feel it.

"You let me lie there."

"I let you have the night you wanted."

"I thought nobody knew."

"I know." His thumb moved on my skin. "I'm sorry. I'm not sorry for keeping quiet. I'm sorry you're upset."

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