Chapter 19: R & R, 1961

I did not go upstairs right away.

I went to the dining room first, to the sideboard where I kept my grandmother's recipe box.

It was a tin box with a dented lid, and Kelsey had carried it to my school in both hands.

Under the card for pie crust, wrapped in wax paper, was something I had found two days after the box came home.

I had not known what to do with it.

Now I did.

When the water shut off upstairs, I carried the folder and the wax paper up the steps.

Bruce came out of the bathroom with a towel around his hips and his hair wet.

He saw the folder in my hand and stopped.

"You found it."

"It was on the kitchen table, with a sticky note."

"Leah, I only meant..."

"Sit down."

He sat on the edge of the bed.

I stood in front of him, and I tore the dissolution agreement in half.

Then I tore it again.

Biscuit, who had followed me up, sat down and watched the pieces fall with real interest.

"I'm not signing it," I said.

"You don't have to decide tonight."

"I've decided."

I dropped the pieces in the wastebasket.

"I'll say what you're afraid of, since you won't."

He didn't answer.

"You think I'm here for the revenge."

"Leah."

"You think when the church is done and Travis has nothing left, I'll look around this house and wonder what I was doing."

His throat moved.

"That's not an insult, Bruce. You've carried it since the courthouse, and I'm tired of watching you carry it alone."

"I don't want you to feel trapped."

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