Chapter 16: Pass

Lena's POV

"Say that again," I said.

The lemons were sliding out of the bag in my arms.

Diane crossed the kitchen and took it from me without a word.

Caleb stood by the table with his hand half raised.

"Lena."

"No. Say the part about Monday. After the wedding."

"I asked for the walls."

"You asked."

"I went to my mother. I asked for the offices, the projects, the separate cars. Your father thought it was his idea."

I had spent three years in that far corner of the fifth floor, with a desk that faced the wrong way.

I had learned to eat lunch alone when Caleb ate with the board.

I had blamed my father.

I had blamed myself.

"Three years," I said.

My voice sounded strange.

"I thought you moved because of something I did."

"Lena..."

"I thought you looked at me and saw the owner's daughter who hadn't earned her chair."

"I know."

"I asked you to dance, and you said 'I'll pass' and walked off!"

"I know, Lena."

"Stop saying you know!"

It rang off the cabinets.

Diane set the bag on the counter, picked up her purse, and touched my arm as she passed.

"The lemons will keep," she said quietly. "So will the pie. Take your time."

Then the green door scraped open and shut behind her, and we were alone.

I turned to Caleb.

I was shaking, and not only with anger.

"Look at me," I said. "Now say why."

"Because the minute I put my hands on you I was never going to take them off."

His voice was raw.

"You were twenty-six. Your mother was two years gone."

"I remember."

"Your father had just stopped crying in his study, and I was the new man in the house with the wrong last name."

He swallowed.

"I thought if I stood far enough away, I couldn't hurt anyone."

"You hurt me."

"I know. I've known every day."

"You let me think you hated me."

"I thought it was kinder than the truth."

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