I Stressed for Months to Be With Them, They Were Never Planning to Be With Me novel · Chapter 2 of 16

Chapter 2: Binding

Connor tells Hallie to give up Bellgrave and be their hired designer, and then Kayleigh turns up as an art award finalist with Hallie's portfolio.

I didn't sleep.

I screenshotted every page of that file.

Then I sat on my bedroom floor and looked at my own owl with somebody else's name under him.

At seven-thirty, someone knocked on the front door.

My mom had already left for her shift.

It was Connor, holding two coffees from the gas station.

He smiled at me.

"Peace offering," he said. "Caramel, extra shot. Your usual."

I didn't take it.

His mom's white SUV idled at the curb. Diane Merrick sat behind the wheel in her sunglasses.

"Look, I was a jerk," Connor said. "I was upset about Kayleigh. I shouldn't have said the diploma thing."

"Okay."

"But I've been thinking. You should call Bellgrave today. You can still get most of your deposit back if you cancel before May."

I stared at him.

"Why would I cancel?"

"Because we'll be in Massachusetts." He said it slowly, like I was a child. "Hal, we can't do long distance. You know how you get."

"How do I get?"

"Stressed. Clingy. You'd be calling me every night crying about calc."

He held the coffee out again.

"The community college out there is really nice. I looked it up for you."

"When did you apply to Westmere, Connor?"

The smile slid off his face.

"What?"

"When did you apply?"

"Last night. I mean, I'm going to. I told you, I'll figure it out."

I pulled out my phone and turned the screen around.

The letter. The date. December 14th.

He looked at it for a long time.

Then he laughed, short and annoyed.

"You went through the folder?"

"It's my folder too."

"Okay. Fine." He set both coffees on the porch rail. "Early Decision is binding. If you get in, you have to go. I couldn't exactly tell you, could I? You'd have made it into a whole thing."

"You grabbed Kayleigh's arm in front of the whole restaurant."

"She was supposed to tell you first. That's on her."

"She got in too."

"Obviously she got in too."

He said it like it was the most normal thing in the world.

I swiped to the next screenshot.

Page three. My screens. Design: K. Danvers.

"And this?"

He barely glanced at it.

"The fellowship needed two founders. Two. Not three. We asked around, and three looks messy."

"You asked around."

"Hal, you're not a founder. You're the designer. Once we get funding, we'll hire you. Contract work. You'd get paid for every screen."

"For my own screens."

"For the screens you'd draw for our company." He sighed. "Why are you making that face? I'm trying to include you."

The car window rolled down.

Diane Merrick pushed her sunglasses up into her blonde hair.

"Connor, honey, we're going to be late."

Then she looked at me.

"Hallie, sweetheart. Nobody's trying to hurt you. Connor and Kayleigh are going to do big things. Somebody has to be happy for them."

"They put Kayleigh's name on my drawings."

"Oh, drawings." She smiled. "Honey, drawings are the easy part."

My neighbor across the street had come out to get her newspaper.

She stood at the end of her driveway, not moving, not pretending anymore.

I picked up the caramel coffee from the rail.

I poured it slowly over the dead petunias in my mom's planter.

"Get off my porch," I said.

Connor's face went red.

"Are you serious right now?"

"Get off my porch, Connor."

He backed down the steps.

At the bottom he turned around.

"Kayleigh said you'd be dramatic. She said you'd freak out and make everybody choose. You know what? She was right. She's always right about you."

He got in the SUV.

Diane pulled away without looking at me again.

I stood on the porch with the empty cup in my hand, shaking.

My phone buzzed.

Then it buzzed again, and again, and kept going.

It was the senior class group chat.

Over two hundred people.

Kayleigh had posted a picture.

It was Dewey. My owl. Sitting on a stack of textbooks, holding a tiny sign that said SWAP ME.

I'd drawn that one in February, during a snow day, on the floor of Connor's living room.

Under it, Kayleigh had written, "SO proud to announce my portfolio Shelfswap is a finalist for the Linden County Young Artist Award!! Ceremony is Friday in the auditorium. Months of work went into this, you guys."

Forty-two hearts.

"OMG V you're so talented."

"Wait you can DRAW??"

"Queen of everything."

Then a reply from Connor, one minute ago.

"Proud of you. Always knew it."

I scrolled up to the award announcement pinned in the chat.

Linden County Young Artist Award. One winner.

The prize was five thousand dollars.

I had entered that award myself.

In January.

With a portfolio of my own drawings, including every single one of those owls.

I'd gotten a form email two weeks later.

"We regret to inform you that your submission was received after the deadline and cannot be considered."

I had turned it in three days early.

I remembered exactly, because Kayleigh had driven me to the post office.

She had offered to drop the envelope in the box for me while I parked.

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