Riot novel · Chapter 23 of 24

Chapter 23: Honor's Answer

Bex stood between the door and my bed with the mop held crosswise in both hands.

"Not one more step," she said.

Honor stopped in the doorway.

She did not look at Bex.

She looked at the bundle on my chest, and her face did something I had not expected.

It crumpled.

It was real, and it was ugly, and for one second I almost felt sorry for her.

Then I remembered the foil in the light.

"Bex," I said. "Let her stand there."

"Joss..."

"I want to say something first."

Bex lowered the mop an inch.

Art had come to the door behind Honor, and he took up a place against the wall, quiet and big.

"You can hold her once," I said. "Five minutes, in this room, in that chair, with Bex and Art watching your hands."

Honor's breath shook.

"Thank you, dear."

"Don't call me that."

She nodded.

"I'm not doing this for you," I said. "She's going to ask someday if she ever met you."

"Yes."

"I want to tell her the truth. I let you hold her once, and then I closed the door."

"I understand."

"You don't. But sit."

She sat.

I lifted the baby, who was awake and frowning, and put her in Honor's arms.

Honor's hands were trembling.

She pulled the blanket back from the tiny face and looked for a long, long time.

"She has his eyes," she said, barely audible. "The Ambrose eyes."

"She has mine," I said.

"Yes."

A tear ran off Honor's chin and landed on the blanket.

She did not wipe it.

"I told myself I did it for love," she said quietly. "For him. For this."

"You did it for you."

Her mouth twitched.

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