The Secret That Broke Us novel · Chapter 11 of 32

Chapter 11: Not My Body

The security guard took Kristin by the elbow, and she let him.

That was the part I hadn't expected.

She didn't fight or scream, and she didn't say another word.

She walked across the lobby between the guard and her own mother, looking straight ahead, with one shoe untied.

At the door, her mother stopped.

She turned around, and she looked at me, and she said, "I'm so sorry, June," in a voice that had nothing left in it.

Then she took her daughter out into the cold.

Nate sat down on the lobby floor.

He didn't fall.

He just folded up, with his back against a planter and the zipper bag in his lap.

Nobody moved him.

The volunteer in the pink vest came out from behind her desk and set a paper cup of water beside him, and went back without a word.

I sat in the wheelchair with my son against my chest and the whole bright room looking at me.

"June," Lena said. "Let's go up."

"One minute."

I looked at Nate.

"Did you know?" I asked.

He lifted his head.

"No."

"Not even a little?"

"I thought it was bad luck," he said. "I thought God didn't want us to have one. I used to pray about it in the car." His mouth twisted. "I thought you were the one who was suffering. I thought the least I could do was be kind."

"You were kind," I said. "To the wrong woman."

He put his face in his hands.

I didn't feel what I thought I would.

I had expected to feel good.

I felt very tired, and very light.

Upstairs, Lena settled me in bed and took Anders so I could drink water.

"I need to say it out loud," I said.

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