Chapter 20: My Way

Jesse's POV

I woke up alone, and for a second I was afraid I'd dreamed the night.

The sheet beside me was still warm.

Abby stood at the window in my flannel shirt, her hair down, looking at the gate.

"Your mother's here," she said.

I was out of bed and into my jeans before she finished.

The gray Buick was where she'd stopped it, ten feet short of the cattle guard, with the engine off and the windows up.

My mother sat behind the wheel with both hands in her lap.

She didn't get out.

I walked down the lane barefoot in the cold gravel, and I opened the passenger door and slid in beside her.

"Mom."

"Good morning, Jesse."

She was in her church coat, though it was Sunday and she had not been to church in a month.

Her face was gray in the early light, but her eyes were clear.

"You shouldn't be driving," I said.

"I've been driving since before you were born."

"The doctor..."

"The doctor can come to my funeral and tell me what I should have done." She smiled a little. "I'm not ready for it yet."

I let out a breath.

I'd been bracing for her to cry.

She didn't.

"I heard what you said to the crew," she said. "The whole county has heard. The pastor's wife called me before breakfast."

"Mom, I should have told you before. Lottie isn't mine."

"I know."

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