Chapter 20: Slower

I told Eli about the folder in the car.

He listened with both hands on the wheel and did not say a word until we were in the garage.

"My lawyer is already at work on it," he said. "Tonight there's nothing to do but wait."

"I hate waiting."

"I know."

"I want to not think."

He looked at me across the console.

"Then don't," he said.

Upstairs he ran the shower in the big bathroom and left the door open.

Steam rolled out across the tile.

I stood in the bedroom and took off my clothes one piece at a time, with him watching from the doorway.

"Is this part of the plan?" he said.

"I've been planning it since Wednesday."

"Which Wednesday?"

"The one where you said stay. I went to sleep thinking, next time slower."

His eyes darkened.

"You told me I'd do what you say."

"Yes. Get in the shower."

He stripped faster than I'd ever seen a man do it.

The water was hot. It ran down his shoulders and the long pale scar on his side.

I stepped in after him and shut the glass door.

For a while I only stood with my hands flat on his chest.

His heart was going hard under my palm.

"I'll tell you what I want," I said.

"Please."

"I want you to wash my hair."

He blinked.

"That's all?"

"That's the start."

He took the shampoo and worked it in with his fingertips, slowly, down to my scalp.

I leaned my head back into his hands and closed my eyes.

"Nobody's ever done this," I said.

"Not even him?"

"Porter liked to be washed. Not the other way."

His hands stilled for one breath.

Then they went on, gentler.

He rinsed me, and his thumbs smoothed the water from my temples.

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