The Last Lesson Was Losing Me novel · Chapter 12 of 24

Chapter 12: Your Rule

"Ask me. Don't investigate me," I said.

"Again."

"Ask me. Don't investigate me."

Cal came around the desk and held the treatment room door open.

"Come in the back," he said. "The waiting room is about to hear all of this."

There were three people in the waiting room, all very interested in the ceiling.

I went in and sat on the table where he'd worked on my spine.

He leaned on the counter across from me with his arms folded and waited.

"I looked you up," I said. "I found the thread. I read all forty-one replies."

"Forty-three now. Two of them are about you."

"What?"

"People wanted to know who looked." He nearly smiled. "Go on."

"I can't stop doing it."

"Doing what?"

"Checking. When someone is kind, I look for what it costs."

"At nineteen I paid a stranger a deposit for a room, and I stood in front of a locked door with my suitcase. Wylie found me. He taught me everything after that."

"And?"

"And I called it safety. Really I couldn't trust my own eyes anymore. So I check everybody."

I looked at my knees.

"I'm sorry. I broke the rule in the first week."

Cal was silent for a while.

Then he crossed the room and stood in front of me, close enough that I had to look up.

"Here's what I'd like," he said. "Ask me what you went looking for."

"What do you mean?"

"The thing you wanted to know. Ask it out loud."

My throat tightened.

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