He Held Her Son the Night I Lost Ours novel · Chapter 10 of 24

Chapter 10: Rafe's Hands

Rafe's POV

At midnight on Sunday, the light was still on in her corner of the studio.

I had told myself I'd only come back for a roll of drawings.

That was a lie, and I'm not good at them.

Willa sat at her desk with the library model pushed aside and a legal pad in front of her, covered in times.

9:31. 9:44. 11:52.

She didn't hear me come in.

I stood by the printer and watched her for longer than I'd admit.

She had pinned her hair up with a pencil, and her shoulders were set hard.

Two years ago I had seen a set of her drawings at a competition in Rotterdam, a courthouse that never got built.

I had pinned a copy over my desk and told nobody why.

When she applied for this job, I had cleared the shortlist myself before lunch.

She had no idea.

I intended to keep it that way until she asked.

"You should be asleep," I said.

She turned the pad over fast.

"So should you."

"I'm the boss. I'm allowed to be an idiot." I put my coat down on the nearest chair. "What's on the pad?"

"Times." She pressed her lips together. "When I know what they mean, I'll tell you."

"I can wait."

"Why?"

It was a real question.

"Because you looked at me in a freezing kitchen and told me you'd rather owe the boiler than a man," I said. "I've been trying to deserve better ever since."

She stared at me.

Then she laughed, once, very tired.

"Take me home, Rafe."

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