He Missed Our Daughter's Birthday Again novel · Chapter 1 of 24
Chapter 1: Five Candles
Leah lights Junie's five candles alone after Roderick leaves for his ex's sick boy, then takes Junie to her sister's and learns he is taking a paternity test.
Forty people were holding paper cups and waiting to sing when my husband's phone lit up on the kitchen counter.
My daughter stood on a chair in her paper crown, five years old as of that morning.
I was thirty weeks pregnant and my feet ached from the lawn games.
I had already lit four of the five candles.
My husband's phone buzzed again, and he picked it up and turned away to read it.
His father had come early that afternoon, before the first guest, with a stuffed rabbit as tall as she was.
He hadn't been to the house in a year.
At the party's midpoint he took a call in the hall, listened for a minute, and came back with his coat over his arm.
"I have to run, sweetheart," my father-in-law said. "Don't wait up. Roderick will handle it."
"Handle what?" I asked.
He kissed my cheek and was gone before I could ask again.
Ten minutes after Clifton left, Roderick was reading his phone by the counter, and the color left his face.
"Leah, I need to step out."
"Now? She's about to blow them out."
He held the phone out to me.
The text was from Celia Barrow, the woman he had dated before me, and it was polite and careful.
"I'm so sorry to do this on Junie's day. Sammy collapsed at school and they've taken him to Children's. He's asking for you. I wouldn't ask if I had anyone else."
Sammy was her six-year-old son.
Roderick had told me about him the week before, in the car, with both hands tight on the wheel.
Celia was back in town, the boy was sick, and she thought he might be Roderick's.
I had said we would handle it together.
I had meant after the party.
"She says he might die," Roderick said quietly. "I can't not go."
"Then go. But Junie is about to make a wish."
"Ten minutes. I'll be back before she blows them out. I promise."
Our daughter was watching us from the chair.
"Daddy, you have to sing first."
"I'll sing in the car and you can hear it in your head," he said.
He kissed the top of her crown and was out the door.
A friend's husband was filming on his phone.
I saw the little red light and the way it swung to find my face.
I smiled for it, because Junie was watching me.
Then I turned to forty people and said, "Let's sing for her anyway."
We sang.
It was loud and slightly flat, and Junie kept looking at the front door.
I lit the fifth candle myself and held her hair back from the flame.
"Make a wish, baby."
"Is it still a wish if Daddy isn't here?"
"It's a better one," I said, and she blew.
My sister, who is an ER nurse and has no patience for anyone, put a slice of cake in my hand and said, "He promised ten minutes."
"He did."
"It's been forty."
At nine o'clock the last guest left with a balloon.
Junie fell asleep on the couch in her crown with frosting on her wrist.
I sat on the edge of the sofa with my hand on the baby's kicking.
I had called Roderick twice, and both calls went to voicemail.
At ten, a text came in from Celia.
"He finally fell asleep holding Roderick's hand. Thank you for sharing him tonight, Leah. You're kinder than I deserve."
Under it was a photo of a hospital bed.
A small bald head on a pillow.
A man's hand wrapped around a child's.
I knew the watch on that wrist, because I had given it to him.
It was the watch I gave him for our fifth anniversary.
I looked at the crown on my sleeping daughter's head.
I looked at the four paper plates still on the counter, the ones he was supposed to help me clear.
He hadn't said "I love you" when he left.
He had said "ten minutes."
I stood up slowly, one hand on my back.
I got Junie's overnight bag from the hall closet and packed her pajamas, her rabbit, and her toothbrush.
So I stepped out, too.
I carried my sleeping daughter to the car, pregnant and shaking, and drove to my sister's across town.
My sister opened the door in her scrubs and took one look at my face.
"Come in," she said. "Don't talk yet."
I put Junie in the spare bed and sat on the edge of the tub in the dark bathroom.
At midnight my phone lit up with Roderick's name.
"I'm so sorry. I'll explain everything in the morning. The hospital asked if I'm Sammy's father, Leah."
A second text followed before I could answer.
"I'm taking the test tonight."
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