Chapter 6: Shout

The storm came over the ridge at dusk, and I went up to the Stone to meet it.

I had not slept since I heard the cold store say my name.

I did not tell anyone I was going.

The Stone was inside the Ridge's boundary, so I was not breaking Torin's rule.

I told myself that, and I put my coat on over my nightshirt.

The wind hit me at the top of the hill.

Rain came sideways, cold and loud, and every drop on the rock sounded separate to me.

I climbed up onto the flat grey top and stood there with my hair in my eyes.

I had been holding something in for ten years.

I took a breath all the way down to my feet.

"Ten years!" I shouted.

The wind took it and threw it back at me, and it felt wonderful.

"Ten years of tea! Ten years of a hand on my mouth!"

My voice cracked on the last word and kept going.

"I learned to say pass the salt with my lips and no sound!"

"I learned to eat so quietly I could hear the others chewing!"

"I learned to cry with my face turned to the wall!"

Down the slope, a long way below, I heard the dogs of the Den go quiet.

I did not think about it.

"And you wished me gone!" I screamed at the dark, at the sea, at a cavern forty miles away.

"On your birthday! With a candle! Over a cake!"

"I hope it was a good wish!"

"I hope you're getting every bit of it!"

I was crying.

I was sobbing out loud, and I had never done that in my life.

Somebody grabbed my arm.

"Hedda!"

Torin was standing on the rock beside me, soaked through, his hair plastered flat.

He had run the whole hill.

I could hear his lungs.

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