Chapter 19: Both Sides of Yes

Box 217 was empty when the Union mailroom opened at seven.

Clara stood in front of it with her heart going.

The clerk behind the counter said, "Ferris came in at five of. He had a key."

"Did anyone else come in?"

"A guy in a leather jacket, about ten past. I told him the same thing I tell everybody."

She did not remember walking out of the building.

At noon she climbed to the third floor of Hartwell Hall and pushed open the door of the seminar room.

It was the same room.

A month ago she had sat at that scarred oak table, alone, with his last letter.

It had said he didn't like her anymore.

Miles was standing at the window with his back to the door.

The envelope was on the table in front of her chair.

His name was on it in her own small, slanted handwriting.

Seeing it there made her stomach turn over.

"You didn't open it," she said.

"No."

"Frank was at the mailroom at ten past seven."

"I watched him from the stairs."

Miles turned around. His face was tired and very still.

"He asked for my box and the clerk said no. Then he left."

"You took it before he could."

"I'd have fought him for it."

"Miles..."

"You broke the rule," he said.

She stood with her hand on the back of a chair.

"I know."

"It was a good rule. You made it."

"I know I did."

"I've been holding that envelope for six hours," he said.

"I didn't open it. I know what your handwriting looks like when it's trying to be brave."

Her face went hot.

"How could you know that?"

"I read forty pages of your seminar paper sophomore year. I've been reading you for a long time."