Chapter 9: An Amendment

Declan left for Burlington at seven in the morning with a clean shirt and a grim face.

I walked him to the truck.

"Say it in your words," I said. "Not hers. Whatever you tell those partners, it comes from you."

"What if I say it wrong?"

"Then it's wrong and it's yours."

He looked at me for a long moment.

Then he kissed my forehead, and I let him.

I went back inside. Roz was at the kitchen table with her hands around a mug.

"You said you'd tell me about the drawer," I said.

"I will."

"Now?"

"Whenever you say." She looked up. "But you're going on a stage tonight."

She held my eyes.

"If I tell you now, you won't be able to stand up there."

I hated that she was right.

"After the reading," I said. "Before anyone sleeps. All three of us."

"I'll be there."

"I know. That's what scares me."

I took the Thai menu from the drawer and turned it over.

On the blank side, under my three rules, I drew a line through the third one.

"Rule three is gone," I said. "New rules. One, I still answer on the eighth day."

I wrote as I talked.

"Two, you still tell me the truth. Three, nobody speaks for me, ever, about anything."

"Four," said Roz.

"There isn't a four."

"There should be." She took the pen from my hand and wrote, in her messy block capitals: NOBODY SLEEPS ALONE UNLESS THEY ASK.

I stared at it.

"That's not fair," I said. "I wanted a fourth rule that was harsh."

"That is harsh," said Roz. "You'll see."

Declan came home at two o'clock, windblown and grey in the face.

He stood in the hall with his coat still on.

"They didn't vote me out," he said.

"What happened?"

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