Chapter 11: Rule One

The Port Alder Inn had eleven rooms, and his was at the end of the second-floor hall.

I knocked at midnight in my coat and boots, with my hair still smelling of the ovens.

He opened the door in his shirtsleeves with the bandage white against his palm.

He had been standing at the window.

I could tell, because the lamp was off and the curtain was still moving.

"Mireille."

"I'm not asking a question," I said. "Not tonight."

I walked past him into the room, and he shut the door.

I turned around with my back to the wall.

"I was awake," I said.

He did not move.

"On the floor. After the shove. I couldn't open my eyes, and I couldn't talk, but I could hear."

"Mireille..."

"I heard you say stop faking it. I heard your shoes. I heard you walk past my head and open the door."

"I know."

"Don't say I know. You said it to the cameras. I needed you to say it to me."

"What do you need?"

"I need you to say you knew I wasn't."

His mouth went tight.

"I knew," Killian said.

The room was very quiet.

"I looked at your face, and I looked at your chest, and I knew you were not faking."

"I chose to tell myself I wasn't seeing what I saw. I'm sorry. I would give everything I have to take it back."

"That's the second time you've said sorry today."

"It will not be the last."

I looked at his hands, at the bandage and the long fingers curled against his thigh.

I had thought all day about what I wanted from him.

Under the anger, the only thing I could find was that I wanted him to stop treating me as breakable.

"Rule one," I said.

"I know the rule."

"Say it."

"I don't touch you unless you say so."

"Good."

I crossed the room and put both my hands flat against his chest.

His heart hit my palms, hard and fast.

"Mireille."

"Don't touch me," I said.

I took hold of his shirt and kissed him.

He stood absolutely still under my mouth.

His hands stayed at his sides, and I felt them shake.

I bit his lower lip, and a sound tore out of his throat.

"Tell me what to do," he said against my mouth. "Anything. I'll do it."

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