Chapter 19: Not Going Anywhere

Lydia crossed the cabin and stopped between his knees.

He sat on the edge of the bed with one boot off, and she put her hands on either side of his face.

His beard was rough under her palms.

"I'm going to lead," she said. "Tonight. If you'll let me."

"You've been leading since the mess hall."

"I haven't been honest since the mess hall. That's different."

She kissed him.

He kissed her back slowly, with his mouth open and his hands resting on her hips, not pulling.

He was still holding something back, and she let him.

She had spent ten years being the one who held back.

She could stand being on the other end of it for one night.

She took off the gray coat and let it drop.

She pulled her sweater over her head, and then her shirt, and stood in front of him in her bra with the cabin lamp warm on her skin.

His breath caught.

"Look at me," she said, and heard how her own words from the other night came back around.

He looked.

She unhooked the bra and let it go.

His hands came up and closed over her breasts, warm and a little rough.

His thumbs dragged over her nipples until she shivered.

"Nolan."

"Yeah."

"Lie back."

He lay back across the bed with his feet still on the floor.

She unbuttoned his jeans and drew the zipper down, and he lifted his hips so she could drag them off with his shorts.

His cock was already hard, flushed and heavy against his stomach.

She wrapped her hand around it and felt him jerk.

"I want to tell you something," she said, "and I want to do it with my mouth full."

He laughed, a short startled sound.

It broke into a groan as she knelt on the floor between his legs and took him in.

He was hot and thick on her tongue.

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