Chapter 10: Wedding Night

"You thought she'd hired me," I said.

"For the dinner. Extra staff. She does that."

"She asked me to sit down."

"Yes."

"She picked me out of a hundred servers."

"Millicent." He held the photograph with both hands. "I don't know what this means."

"I need to find out before I say something I can't take back."

"Then go and find out."

"I will. Come with me."

"No."

"Why not?"

The snow came down between us on the step. A car went by on Marlborough Street, and its headlights crossed his face.

I had been carrying it for three years.

I had carried it through our wedding photographs and our first Christmas.

I had carried it every night he put his hand on my hip in the dark.

I put the duffel down.

"On our wedding night you said her name," I told him.

He didn't move.

"We'd had champagne. You fell asleep first.

"I was lying beside you, still in my wedding lingerie, and in your sleep you said Leona."

"Millicent."

"Not loudly. Just once, softly."

I was surprised how steady my voice stayed.

"I never told you. I got up and made tea and came back to bed."

"In the morning you kissed me and said, good morning, Mrs. Thackeray."

"I didn't know."

"Of course you didn't know. You were asleep."

"I would have told you it was a dream, that it meant nothing."

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