When He Finally Chose Me I Was Gone novel · Chapter 20 of 32

Chapter 20: Tell Me

Linnea's POV

In July, Elin rented a cottage on Park Point for a week, and said the sea air was medicinal.

It was a narrow strip of sand between Lake Superior and the Duluth harbor.

On the third Saturday night I put Wren down on a quilt on the beach, with a hat on her head, and lit a small fire in a ring of stones.

Soren sat on the other side of the quilt, with his shoes off.

It was ten o'clock and still not quite dark.

The lake was lilac, with a thin red line at the edge of the sky.

Wren lay on her back and watched the sparks, with one fist in her mouth and the other flung out toward the dark.

We had done eleven Tuesdays and Saturdays by then.

I had kept count without meaning to.

I had learned the sound of his car in the street.

"Can I ask you something?" I said.

"Anything."

"It's a hard one."

"Then it's the right kind."

I looked at the fire.

I had put this question away for months, because the answer might be worse than not knowing.

"You looked at me," I said. "In the ballroom. I saw your face change. You took a step. I blew the whistle, and you turned your head. I know you saw me. You told me at the door that you did."

"I did."

"So tell me why you left me."

He did not answer at once.

The fire ticked.

Wren made a small, fretful noise, and he put out a hand and laid it very gently on her stomach, and she settled.

"I froze," he said.

"That's not enough."

"I know it isn't." He kept his eyes on his hand. "I'm going to tell you the truth, and it will not make me look better. Will you let me say it?"

"Yes."

"When I saw you under the beam, I knew what I was looking at. My whole body knew. I was going to put her down and come to you. I had the step half taken."

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