Chapter 13: Right Here

Nobody moved.

The lantern hissed on the grave, and the snow came down between the three of us.

Dario was still on his knees.

He looked at me and did not seem to believe I was there.

"Carina," he said. "How long have you been standing there?"

"Since your father sent you to Bensonhurst."

His face went grey.

Mirella was the first to move.

She bent, picked up the lantern and held it so the light fell on me and not on her.

"Cari," she said gently. "You're shaking. Come here."

"Stay where you are."

"You've had a terrible shock. Dario, help her."

"Don't tell him to touch me," I said.

She let the lantern drop to her side and sighed.

"Well. You heard it all, so we needn't pretend. I would have told you myself one day, when it was over."

"When I was dead."

"When you were free of him."

"You told me half a pill was safe," I said.

"You believed me because you always did." Her voice caught for one moment. "That's the only part of it I'm sorry for."

I wanted to hit her, and I wanted to sit down in the snow and cry.

I did neither, because her face had already begun to change.

It was the face she wore when she was working out the sum.

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