Chapter 16: Why You Never Pushed

Simon drove me home through the rain and did not ask what I had read.

I put the box file on my mother's desk and stood looking at it.

"My father signed the first payment," I said.

"I know."

I turned round.

"You know."

"Leland sent me a note this afternoon, before you went in."

Simon stood in the study doorway with his hands at his sides.

"He thought you'd want someone to tell you the name. I told him you'd read it yourself."

"You didn't tell me either."

"It wasn't mine to tell."

I laughed, short and tired.

Then I crossed the room and stopped a step in front of him.

"Ask me something," I said.

"What?"

"Anything. You never do."

"I'd like to know if you've eaten."

"That isn't what I meant."

"I know what you meant." His eyes held mine.

"Then answer the one I haven't asked," I said. "You've known since the gala.

"You could have told me on the terrace, or in the car, or in my mother's study that first night.

"You could have made me need you."

"I could have."

"Everybody else did. Leland pushed. My father pushed. Cecily pushed so gently I thanked her."

"Imogen."

"Why didn't you?"

He was quiet for a moment.

The lamp on my mother's desk made a circle on the floor between us.

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